Raphael's Adventures in Babysitting
by MouthTapedShut
Summary: Raph is tasked with babysitting April's sixteen year old niece, Paige. He quickly learns, however, the young punk-rock girl isn't interested in being treated like a kid, and finds himself facing off against her in a battle of wits... which he immediately loses and finds himself tied up and gagged? Raphael-in-distress? Turtle Tickle Torture? What has he gotten himself into?
1. Chapter 1

Raphael's knuckles were hovering just below the plastic numbers of April's apartment when the door beneath them pulled back. April's eyes widened upon spotting him and a smile rose up her face. "Raph! Perfect timing! And thank you _so _much for coming on short notice," she said, bending over to pull a high-heeled shoe onto her foot and snatch her purse up from the desk beside the door. She swung around to check herself in the hall's mirror, puffing up her heavily-styled hair and dabbing a finger at a rogue spot of lipstick that had wandered too far from her lips.

"Ah, it's no prob, April," Raph told her. "Just, uh, are you _sure _your niece needs a babysitter? I mean, didn't you say she's sixteen?"

"Yup," April confirmed, sidling past Raphael. He smelt a sweet perfume on her shoulders as she passed ."But, well, it's _dangerous _out there, Raph. You know that more than anyone. I just don't feel comfortable leaving her here all alone while I'm on this date. You understand, right?"

He opened his mouth to answer, but April kissed him on the nose before he could.

"Thanks, Raph. I'll be back in two hours. _Three _tops." She began heading down the hallway, but halted and spun back to him halfway through. "Oh, and, about Paige... she's... well, she's a teenager. She might _act _tough, but she's a big softie under all those piercings and tattoos, I swear."

"Piercings and tattoos...?" Raph echoed, scratching at his chin.

"I'm glad it's _you_, Raph, and not one of the other guys. You're probably the only one who can handle her," April said, turning to head back to the apartment elevators. She stepped inside when they opened and waved goodbye. "Three hours! Maybe four..."

"Four!?" Raph shouted, but by then, the doors had closed and he was alone in the hall. He sighed, shook his head, and slipped inside April's apartment, closing the door behind him.

There was two, fresh, trays of pizza stacked on the kitchen table, and Raph couldn't hold back the grin when he saw them. At least April knew how to treat him right. He opened a box, stabbed a slice with his sai, and brought it to his beak.

It was nearly in his mouth when a girl's voice said, "What the frick are _you_ supposed to be?"

Raphael turned to face the living room. Inside, illuminated only dimly by the soft blue glow of the television, April's niece, Paige, was seated on the couch. Her hair was cut short and dyed a vibrant shade of red, and Raph could see studs in her nose and eyebrow and lip, shining when the TV light caught against them. Her arms were folded defiantly across her chest, each one inked from wrist to shoulder in tattoos, and she wore a matching set of studded bracelets and a choker. Her feet were bare, black nail polish on the toes, and kicked up on the table. She did not look happy to see him.

"I'm a turtle," Raphael told her. "What the frick are _you _supposed to be?" He asked, stepping into the living room and taking a bite of the pizza skewed on his sai.

"April told me you were some mutant weirdo," Paige went on, grimacing as she looked him up and down. "But I wasn't expecting... _this_." She fished a phone out of her pocket and held it up to him. Raph instinctively held his hand out to shield himself. "Let me take your picture, weirdo! I want to put this on Facebook. It's not every day you're Aunt's friend is a giant, talking, turtle."

"I'm your _babysitter_," Raphael corrected her, hating the way the word sounded. He stepped forward and gently kicked her feet from the table. "And I don't think April would want your bare feet all over her table. Now put that phone down or I'll take that too, kid."

Paige's face scrunched up indignantly. "Are you for _real_? I'm sixteen years old. I'm only _letting _you watch me because April begged me to. I don't have to do what you say."

"Actually, ya do," he said. "And now the phone is mine." He reached for it and she pulled it away.

"Go to hell, freak!" She shouted, stuffing it back in her pocket. "I won't take your stupid picture."

Raphael grunted, but didn't have the patience to purse the phone any further. He shook his head, crossed back to the recliner at the opposite end of the living room, and slumped down to finish his pizza. It was hot, cheesy, and good.

Paige was still staring at him as if he were covered in garbage or something. "What's with that stupid headband? What are you a superhero or some crap?"

"A ninja, actually," he told her. "And if you keep that mouth up, I might have to show you some ninja _moves_, got it? Sit there and shut up. Geeze, if April had told me you were a little snot-nosed punk, I woulda never came."

Paige eyed him up shrewdly. "A ninja? Yeah right."

He lifted a sai. "Check that out. Would a _non_-ninja carry this around? Huh?"

She frowned. "Anyone can carry anything around if they steal it," she pointed out. She bit her lip as her eyes flicked across his body. "If you're a _real _ninja, I bet you know all kinds of tricks to, like, beat up on bad guys, or, maybe... I don't know... escape if you're captured?"

"I can beat up _tons _of bad guys. Same time, too," Raph told her, finishing the last bite of his pizza. His stomach grumbled, ready for more.

"Prove it," Paige taunted him.

"Prove it? How exactly am I supposed to do that, genius, there aren't any bad guys _around_."

"No, prove you can escape like a true ninja," Paige said. "Let me tie you up and we'll see if you can get loose."

Raphael laughed. "Yeah, okay. I'm not letting you anywhere _near _me, kid. Make yourself useful and go get me a slice of pizza."

"Are you a turtle or a _chicken_?" She asked, raising a brow. "Look, April hangs her clothes out the window on that clothesline. I'll use that and try and tie you up. If you get loose, fine, you're a ninja. I'll shut up and, hell, I'll even go and get you your pizzas when you need them."

"You'll shut up?" He asked.

She nodded.

Raph shook his head. "I'm holding you to that, kid. Go ahead and _try _to tie a ninja up. You're going to see how pointless it is."

A grin rose up the girl's face. She hopped off the couch, moving with an energy Raph wouldn't have thought possible of the little punk, and moved to the apartment window to pull down April's clothesline. When it was bundled up in her arms, she stood before Raph's chair and tapped her foot impatiently. "Turn around, weirdo, and put your hands together behind you."

"Do my legs first," Raphael said. He was no fool: he wanted to make sure the punk wasn't some expert rope handler or something before he went letting her wrap him up.

She rolled her eyes and dropped to her knees. His legs were pulled together at the ankles and he felt the ropes start to circle them. "You should wear shoes," Paige told him. "Your big weird feet are gross."

"Same to you, kid," he said, taking pleasure when he saw her eyes flick angrily to his own.

"Alright, now turn around," she said when his ankles were finished.

Raph squirmed around a bit, testing them. _Amateur_, he thought upon feeling the looseness, and immediately turned in the chair. The girl wasted no time grabbing his arms and wrenching them back. She crossed his wrists together and ropes wrapped them. "You know, when I was a kid, my stupid parents made me do all sorts of stupid stuff." She told him as she worked. A rope fell around his chest. "Most of it was useless crap. They tried turning me into some good-two-shoes chick. But I couldn't be molded so easily. I'm too smart for that crap." More rope looped his body and elbows. "The only real thing that stuck that had some use was the dumb girl scout training I took. I learned knots and ropes. _Real _good."

All at once, every rope around Raphael, even the previous one at his ankles, tightened considerably. His eyes went wide and he pulled at his wrists, but the girl's ropes held. He kicked his feet around, but the slack that had been there was missing, and only a tight squeeze met his struggle, denying him the freedom to move. "_Hey_!" He snapped, writhing side to side in the chair to turn back around and face her. "What is this?" He couldn't budge.

Paige smirked and shook her head as she looked down at him. "You're no ninja. You're an _idiot_."

"Alright, kid, ha-_ha_!" He shouted. "Ya got me. Get me the hell out of this right _now_ or-"

"Or what?" Paige finished, laughing as Raph felt his face turn as red as his bandanna. "You're tied up, doofus. I don't give a crap about your threats. By the time April gets back, I'll just split while she's trying to figure out how to get you loose."

"You little _punk_!" He shouted, twisting every which way he could to loosen the ropes binding him. He could find not one inch of slack. "Untie me! Now!"

Paige rolled her eyes again, laughed, and headed past him into the kitchen. Raph glared furiously at her as she passed him. He wiggled desperately in the chair until she returned a moment later with a roll of duct tape in her hand. "You've got a big _beak_, weirdo." She said, ripping tape from the roll. "About time you gave it a rest."

"Don't you even think about it you little punk!" Raphael shouted.

"God, shut _up_!" She said, using her teeth to cut a strip of tape free.

"You can't tape my mouth shut you-" She shoved the duct tape hard across his beak, smoothing it down over his lips. "_MMMMPH! MMMMMMMPH!_"

"Better," Paige said, smirking. She dug into her pocket and pulled out her phone. As Raphael mumbled furiously into the tape sealing his mouth shut, she hopped onto his lap, angled the phone out away from the two of them, and began throwing up 'metal' signs and sticking out her tongue as she snapped photo after photo.

"_MM-MM!_" Raph protested.

"Oh this is going to be on top of _everyone's_ feed," she said, pulling the phone close to go to work at the small screen with both thumbs. "I'm going to be a Facebook star. Thanks, freak."

"_GRMMMPH!_"

"Let's see... title... 'Turtle Freak Epic Babysitter Fail'," she said with a laugh. "Yup. Perfect."

"_Mmmph! Mmmph! MMM!_"

"Do you really think that if you keep making that noise I'm going to take your gag off?" She asked. "Are you _really _that stupid? Sit there and keep your big beak shut. Oh, how about that pizza?" She hopped off his lap, disappeared behind his shoulder, and returned a moment later with a slice. She held it to her nose, sniffing deeply at the cheese. "Mmmm, that's good. Oh, looks like you can't have a bite, though. Too bad. More for me." She laughed as she took a big bite.

Raphael glared at her, shaking his head in disgust.

"Enjoy your night, freak," she said, tapping her finger to his duct-taped beak and sauntering off to the couch, plopping down and kicking her feet back up on the table. She took another bite of pizza as she turned the volume on the TV up to drown Raph's mumbles.

Raph did not care for this.


	2. Chapter 2

He hopped, leaping through the air as graceful as a, well, _turtle. _Raph's feet thumped against the tiled kitchen floor as he came back down, and he immediately felt his balance waver. His eyes widened as his whole body began tipping to one side, but there was not much else he could do to stop it: his hands, arms, torso, and legs were still wrapped tightly in April's little punk-of-a-niece's ropes. He craned his neck forward, his feet shifting in desperation to prevent a fall, and after one, dizzying, moment, he regained his balance. He breathed a sigh of relief.

From behind the closed bathroom door, he heard the toilet flush. Raph snapped his head back to the kitchen and eyed up the pair of scissors lying on the countertop. His time had just been considerably shortened; Paige would be coming out of the bathroom at any second. Throwing caution to the wind, he hopped again, wiggled about to maintain his balance, and hopped _again_. The scissors came closer and closer with every jump, and just as he was ready to knock them off the counter and into his bound hands behind his shell, Paige appeared in the kitchen.

His eyes moved to hers and glared. She folded her arms across her chest, chortled, and shook her head. "Seriously? You're trying to _hop _your way to freedom? You're supposed to be a turtle, not a frog, right?"

Raphael ignored her, refusing his temper to rise, and made the final hop to the scissors before she could stop him. The tip of his beak was _just _about to graze them when Paige snatched them up and buried them in a drawer beneath the sink. "_GRMMPH!_" Raph grunted. His mouth was still sealed shut with duct tape.

"Dork," Paige taunted him with a laugh. She raised her hand between them and extended her index finger towards the ceiling. Raph frowned, looking from her to it and back. She grinned, brought the finger to his chest, and gently shoved.

"_MMMMMM!_" Raph mumbled as he tipped backwards, unable to stop himself. He collapsed to April's kitchen floor atop his shell, teetering for a moment on its curved plating before coming to a slow, helpless, stop.

Paige stood over him, hands on hips, a delighted grin on her face. "This is too funny. This is actually the best present Aunt April could have given me. A big, dumb, turtle to push around." She snapped another photo of him with her phone.

Raph balled his hands into fists and he drove his heels into the floor, writhing side to side in attempt to loosen his ropes. Paige watched him, laughing all the while, until a knock came at the apartment door. Raph froze and stared up at her. The girl didn't seem worried, in fact, she looked quite the opposite. Her grin had turned to a smile, and her brow lifted beneath her short, bright red, hair. "My guests! Yay!" She cheered, clapping her hands and turning to disappear into the hall.

"_Guests_!?" Raphael called after her, or _would _have if the duct tape didn't turn it to "_Gmph!?_" He heard April's door open and close, and then a sound that sent a chill up his shell: the chatter of a group of teenage girls. He worked more desperately than ever at freeing himself, but he hadn't made even an inch of progress by the time they came hovering over him.

Paige was joined by two more girls at either side. To her left was a short girl with bleached blonde hair styled into spikes, and on her right was a girl with brown hair that was twisted up in dreadlocks around a black bandanna on her brow. Both were just as tattooed and pieced as Paige, and _both _had the same stunned expression on their face.

"Whoa," the blond whispered. "You weren't messin' around, huh?"

"Is he _real_?" Dreadlock girl asked, poking at his knee with the toe of her boot.

"Yup. Told you my Aunt has some weird friends," Paige explained, looking absolutely delighted to be showing Raphael off to her friends. "Help me get him into the kitchen chair so you can get a better look at him."

"Is he dangerous?"

Paige rolled her eyes. "Does he _look _dangerous?"

The two girls stared down at him, looking over every inch of his rope-covered body. Their eyes found each others, held, and then they broke into laughter.

Raph felt his face redden.

The three girls didn't have an easy time getting him up and into the kitchen chair, and Raphael certainly wasn't making it any easier for them. He squirmed and writhed as their little punk hands took hold of his arms and torso and hoisted him up. They grunted with the exertion, and twice they had to set him back down to catch their breath, but on the third try, they shoved him into the kitchen chair and Raph slumped down to the seat. Paige wasted no time taking the last of the clothesline and wrapping him to the chair's back to ensure he wasn't going anywhere. Raphael watched her circle him, glowering the whole time.

"There we go," she said as she finished, knotting him up tightly. "Pretty cool, right?"

"Can we get a picture, too?" The blond asked, her eyes widening on Raphael with curiousity.

"Sure," Paige said. "He _loves _getting his picture taken."

Raph's eyes found hers and shot her daggers, but Paige only patted him on the head. The girls took turns then seating themselves on his lap, angling their phones away from themselves, and snapping pictures. Raph could only grind his teeth and tighten his fists as flash after flash went off before him. When they finished, all three buried themselves in the glow of their phone screens and set about, what he assumed, to post the pictures all over the internet.

"OMG!" Dreadlocks shouted. "Did you see Bobby's comment on my pic!?"

"Did you see Trevor's on mine?" The blonde asked.

They went on like that for fifteen minutes, bragging to one another about who liked whose picture and who commented and who shared, and all the while Raphael looked between the three of them incredulously, wishing he had never picked up April's stupid call asking him to come babysit in the first place.

When they had their fill of Facebook, the girls' attention turned back on him. Dreadlocks coiled a dreadlock around her finger and pursed her lips as she stared down at him. "Can he talk?"

"Oh, he talks," Paige admitted. "Too _much _if you ask me. Hence the duct tape." She tapped his taped beak as Raph grumbled his protest.

"I want to hear it," the blonde said. "Does it speak English?"

"No, Stacy, he speaks ancient Egyptian," Paige responded dryly with a roll of her eyes. "Of _course _he speaks English. He lives here in New York. In the _sewers _like some gross hobo."

Both her friends grimaced.

"Well take the muzzle off then," Dreadlocks said. "Let's hear him."

Paige sighed, twisted her lips as she glanced down at Raphael. "Well... alright, Chloe, but don't say I didn't warn you about his big beak flapping." She reached down, dug her nails under the edge of the tape, and _ripped _it hard from his lips.

Raphael was so angry, for a second her barely knew what to say. Then he took a deep breath and flicked his eyes between the three of them. "Alright, _one _of you little punks better untie me _right now_! I'm a Ninja Turtle! Ever hear of us? We beat up bad guys? Save the day? Now you get me _out _of this chair and... and I won't even be mad. Alright? Paige, did you hear me!? Let me go now and we forget about this whole thing! I- dammit, I'm _sick _of being tied up like this! Get me out!" He shouted, rocking side-to-side in the chair.

"I warned ya," Paige said, shaking her head. "Never shuts up."

"Hello, Raphael! I am Stacy!" The blonde said, speaking slowly and deliberately, as if she were talking to a foreigner who didn't quite grasp the English language. "Welcome to Earth!"

Raphael frowned.

Paige did too. "What? He's not an _alien_! I mean... I don't _think _he's an alien."

"He _looks _like an alien," the girl with dreadlocks, Chloe, added.

"How do we know he isn't?" Stacy questioned.

"I'm not!" Raph protested.

"That's exactly what an alien would say, though," Paige admitted with a nod of her head.

Raph's whole body heated up in a rage. "I- You- What- Would you just _untie me_ already!"

Paige narrowed her eyes on him, a pensive look on her face. After a moment, she grinned. "Let's put makeup on him!"

"Yeah!" Chloe agreed.

"Cool," Stacy added.

"_NO_!" Raph protested.

"Quiet, Alien," Paige demanded.

Another knock came on the apartment door, and this time, Paige did not look thrilled to hear it. Her brow lifted and she looked wide-eyed to her two friends. She gulped.

"Hey, Raph? Um, Paige? It's Leo," Leonardo's voice came from the hall.

"Leo! In here!" Raph shouted, and maybe for the first time in his life, he was happy to hear his blue-bandanna-wearing brother's voice.

Paige scrambled for the duct tape, and by the time Raphael saw her snatching it up and ripped a piece free, it was too late. He made to shout, but the sticky adhesive layered across his beak once again, and only a muffled, "_MMMM!_" sounded from his mouth.

Leonardo came walking into the kitchen from the hall, and Donny and Mikey appeared over his shoulder a moment later. Raph's three brothers looked from the girls to Raph stuck in his chair, and finally to Paige. "Uh... are you Paige?" Leo asked.

"Oh, yeah!" Paige said, scooting around the chair to stand before Leo. "You're the turtles, huh?Aunt April told me so much about you! It's an _honor _to finally meet you! I'm a big fan. I think... well I think you guys are just the coolest guys around."

Michelangelo flicked his wrist and lowered his head. "Ah, stop," he said shyly.

"No, really," Paige went on. "Raphael has been so great to me and my friends. He's told us all about you guys. You seem really, _really_, awesome."

"_MMMMPH! MMMMM!_" Raph mumbled, shaking his head frantically, desperate to reveal the little punk's lies.

"Uh, why is he all tied up?" Donatello asked.

"He asked me to do it," Paige lied. "He wanted to get some training in til April comes back, so I told him I had experience with knots from girl scouts. He was _really _insistent on me making it as tight as possible."

"_MM-MM! MMMMMPH!_"

"I didn't tell him I was going to tape his mouth shut, though," Paige explained. "He's... kind of upset about it, but I really thought it would help his training in case he gets captured by those, uh, Feet Clan guys? I mean, I guess I can take the tape off if you want..." she said, pursing her lips disappointedly and turning to his chair.

"Nah, I think it's an improvement for ole Raph here," Leonardo went on, crossing to Raphael and smiling as he poked at his taped beak. "This is the longest I've heard him go without talking since I've known him!"

"_GRRMM!_" Raph grunted, glowering at Leonardo and stomping his feet.

Leo laughed. "Definitely an improvement. Well, alright. We only stopped in because April asked us to. It was nice meeting you, Paige. We'll have to hang out sometime, huh?"

"Oh, absolutely," Paige cooed. "You guys are so awesome! I would _love _to get to know you all." She moved to Raphael and hopped up on his lap. "I can only hope you're as smart and cool as Raphael here." She patted his head as Raph grumbled curses at her beneath the tape. Her hand reached up and clamped tightly over his beak, quieting him down further. "I can't wait til he gets out of this. I just know he will soon because of how talented of a ninja he is."

"Alright, see you, Paige," Leo called out as his other brothers waved. "See ya, Raph. Good luck." He laughed, turned, and the turtles were gone; April's door slamming shut a moment later.

Raphael's chance at freedom had come and gone.

And now he had three, excited, teenage girls staring at him.

"Get that makeup," Paige said, pinching his cheek. "Let's make the turtle pretty!"

"_MMMMMMPH!_"


	3. Chapter 3

The mirror raised to his eyeline. Raphael looked into it, caught his reflection, and saw the ugliest-looking thing he'd ever seen looking back out at him. The girls had covered his face in makeup. There was a funny hot-pink tint around his eyes (they'd pulled his bandana down around his neck), purple streaks of eyeliner beneath them, his cheeks were dabbed in a dark blush, and one of the little punks had even gone as far to draw penciled eyebrows onto his forehead, angled down to make him look angry. He didn't need the makeup for _that_. He was furious.

His eyes moved from the mirror to Paige's smirking face beside it and he grumbled a threat into the tape she'd sealed his mouth shut with. "_Mm mm grmm mmmmph fm_..."

"What a pretty turtle," she cooed, batting her eyelashes in mock exaggeration.

"He's so _cute_ now," Stacy, the girl with blonde spiky hair, added, dabbing at Raph's cheeks for a final touch-up. "We can name her.. Raphina!"

Chloe shifted her dreadlocks aside and bit at her bottom lip. "I think... he's kind of freaky looking. I mean, he already _was _pretty nasty, but... this is just too much."

Paige laughed. "Well, let's see what the freak has to say about it for himself, huh?" She shoved her index finger to the tip of Raph's beak and fixed him with a stern look. "No shouting or asking to be untied or the tape goes right back on and _stays _on! Got it, dork?"

Raphael glared.

"Freaky turtle man? Hellooo? Do you understand or not?"

"_GRMPH!_" He grunted, giving in and nodding his head.

Paige smiled. "Good boy," she said, patting his head before digging her fingers beneath the tape atop his beak and ripping it away. "Never gets old," she said with a laugh and crumpled the tape into a ball.

Raph used every bit of willpower he had to keep his anger in check. "Alright... get this makeup off me."

"But you're so _pretty_!" Paige retorted, her smirk widening.

"Get if off _now _you little punk before I-"

She rolled her eyes. "There goes his _mouth _goes again. Chloe... get me the duct tape."

"Wait!" Raph shouted, eyeing the silver roll resting atop the counter. The _last _thing he wanted was his mouth taped up again. "Alright, whatever. Leave the makeup on. Just... can we at least be _reasonable _here? You got me, kid. You beat me. You're... whatever, you're the stupid _queen_. I'm sick of this crap now, though. And I'm hungry."

"You're already giving up?" Paige asked. "How... disappointing. We were just starting to have fun."

"_Fun_!?" Raph barked. "You think it's _fun _having a couple of snot-nosed punks tie you to a chair and put makeup on you!?"

The three girls shared a look. "Uh... yeah?" Questioned Stacy. "It seemed like a lot of fun."

"Good practice," Chloe added with a nod. "I mean... I've always wondered if I could do eyebrows. I have now learned: I cannot."

"The most _funnest _part is where we do something you don't like and then you're all like '_Mm-mm! Mm-mm!'_" Paige said, covering her own mouth to mock him. "You sound like a _real _doofus when that's goin' on."

Raphael had to close his eyes and picture a big, hot, cheese pizza, steaming and sailing forth on a rocketship of deliciousness into his belly. It was the only way to keep himself from screaming at the little punks at the top of his lungs.

"What's he doing?" Chloe wondered aloud.

"Well, he still might be an alien. Maybe he's channeling his home planet," Stacy answered. "Like through telepatchies."

"Tele_patchies_?" Paige echoed.

"Yeah. It's like mind reading or something."

"Shut up!" Raphael barked, unable to keep his cool any longer. "Would you all just shut the hell _up_ and let me go!?"

Stacy looked hurt. "Well you don't have to be _mean _about it..."

"Yeah, and don't yell at us, turtle-breath!" Paige scolded him, extending her finger and jabbing his side.

Raphael jerked away from the poke, a tremor of ticklish goosebumps running his skin. "Alright, no yelling," he agreed with a gulp.

"Wait a second..." Paige said, fixing him with a shrewd look. She raised her finger again and poked at the spot where his armpit met his shell.

_"Stop!"_ Raph yelped and squirmed to the side, though the ropes wrapping him to the chair didn't allow him to get very far.

"O-M-F-G!" Paige cheered. "Ticklish turtle! Get him!"

"NO!" Raphael wailed, but by then it was too late.

The girls descended upon his chair like a flock of birds to a piece of bread in Central Park, their slender little fingers jabbing and poking and tickling at his arms and neck and thighs. "_HA!" _Raph couldn't help but bark. "_Ha-ha! STOP! Ho! Hoo-hahahaha! STOP!_" His laughter sent the girls into fits of giggles of their own. Paige bit excitedly at her lip as she drove both hands into his neck until Raph tried retreating his head into its shell. He could only pull back so far, though, and it was not enough to stop the girl's mad tickling all over his cheeks and nose. "_HEEHAHAHA!_" He roared, his eyes closing on their own as tears swelled in them. He was jerking and spasming in the chair so violently from the girl's relentless assault, he felt the thing tip back on its rear legs. He tried leaning forward to counter-balance the weight, but Paige's fingers found his beak and tickled at it till he collapsed back in a fit of laughter. The chair crashed to the kitchen floor, Raphael landing on his shell atop it still wrapped too tight to budge, but he didn't even care. He had at least put some distance between his sensitive skin and the evil girls wandering fingers.

"Ooo," Chloe said, tapping her fingers together sadistically. "Let's tickle his feet!"

"_NO!_" Raphael pleaded, desperately shaking his head.

"Ew, gross," Paige whined. "I'm not touching those things." Just as Raph was breathing a sigh of relief, she added, "I'll get my Aunt's toothbrush. Tie his ankles to the chair legs."

Paige disappeared into the hall and Chloe and Stacy set about strapping his legs down, matching diabolical grins on their teenaged faces. "Girls," he pleaded. "Just... just consider what you're doing here. You don't have to listen to her, you know. I'm a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle! I'm practically famous! I'm _rude, _but... I'm cool, too! _Girls_!? Can you hear me? I'm-" Chloe ran her fingers along the sole of his foot. "_S-STOPAHAHAHA!_"

The dreadlocked girl flashed a mischievous grin at her friend across the chair. "Well that shut him up, huh?"

Paige returned, waving April's toothbrush in the air before her like a victory flag. "_Aaaaaand- _it's _electric_!" She exclaimed, flicking a switch and sending the brush into vibrations.

"That's your Aunt's spare or something, right?" Stacy asked. "That would be crazy-gross to put all over his turtle-feet if that's the only one she has, Paige."

Paige shrugged. "Who cares? Let's torture him!"

"_Paige_!" Raph shouted. "I've put up with a lot of crap tonight, but If you do this to me, you're _screwed_! Do you hear me? I'll get you back somehow and when I do-"

"Can you keep your big beak shut or do you need it shut _for_ you?" Paige asked, lifting the roll of duct tape and waving it tauntingly before him. "'Cause I can _happily _arrange that. Hmm? Do you need assistance _shutting up _or what?"

Raphael glowered at her, gritting his teeth, but knowing if he made a peep, she'd actually do it.

"Now we're going to tickle your big ugly feet, and if you say anything besides 'Hee-hee' or 'Ha-ha'? Well pardner, yer gettin' this here tape on that there beak of yers. Capisce?"

She turned the toothbrush on again. The _hummm_ filled the kitchen.

Raph glared at her. He shook his head defiantly.

Paige nodded, her smirk rising.

He squinted.

She squinted too.

Chloe and Stacy looked between the two of them, confused/frightened expressions glued to their faces.

"TURTLE TICKLE ATTACK!" Paige wailed and jammed the toothbrush between his toes.

"_HAHAHAHA!_" Raphael roared in uncontrollable fits of laughter as Paige worked every inch of his feet over with April's toothbrush, sending wave after wave of ticklish spasms up his leg. "_HEEHEE STOP! S-STOP! HEEHOOHAHAHA!_" Raph begged helplessly. She ran the brush up and down the arch of his foot, tickling extra-furiously at the heel. Raphael went light-headed, the room spinning around him as he laughed and laughed and laughed some more. Paige was relentless, she was cruel, she was merciless, and evertime he thought she might stop, she started again!

"Who's the coolest!?" She shouted over his laughter.

"_Y-You! YOU!_" He begged, rocking side to side as his feet were assaulted.

"You ain't my name, turtle-toes," Paige told him.

"_PAIGE! HEE-HA-HA! PAIGE IS TH-THE, HAHA, COOLEST!_" He pleaded.

She stopped tickling. "Do you really mean it?"

Raph gasped at the air to catch his breath. "Yes! You're the coolest! Just... stop... tickling... my... feet."

"Alright he's had enough," Paige said. "Get him up."

The three girls worked the chair back to its legs and Raphael slumped into his ropes, exhausted. When his breath returned to him and the room stopped spinning, he lifted his head and Paige took a damp towel to his face, cleaning the makeup away before pulling his bandanna back over his eyes. She smirked, patting his cheek. "See, I'm not so bad," she said, reaching to the table, popping the lid on a tray of pizza, and carrying a slice carefully over to him. "Open," she said, holding the slice before his beak.

As humiliating as it was to be _fed _by the little punk, Raph was so hungry, he did as she said, and Paige guided it between his teeth. He chomped down on it, letting the delicious taste linger on his tongue for every, wonderful, moment he could before swallowing.

"Good?" She asked, dabbing at his lips with a napkin for crumbs.

Raph eyed her suspiciously. After a moment, he slowly nodded.

"Is your turtle-tummy all full?" She asked sweetly.

Raph didn't like that tone of voice. He gulped.

"Because if it _is_..." She began. "Then its turtle tickle time again!"

"Paige," he growled. "When I get out of these ropes..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she said with a roll of her eyes. "I'm dead meat. I got that. Thing is - you ain't gettin' out anytime soon, dork."

Raphael was getting ready to threaten her when Leonardo came walking up behind the girl's shoulder. His brother was frowning down upon the sixteen year old with a perplexed look on his face. He cleared his throat and Paige spun around to face him. Her friends had retreated to the living room.

"Leo!" Raph shouted. "Listen to me before this devil-girl tapes my mouth shut again-"

"I heard, Raph," Leo said. "I figured something funny was up, so when Donny and Mikey went home, I stayed behind to come back and check on you once more. Paige... what are you _doing _to him_?"_

Paige's stunned expression moved between the two turtles, and suddenly her lip began to quiver and she buried her face in her hands in (what Raph _knew _was) a fake cry. "H-h-he was being _mean _to me..." she moaned into her hands.

"Oh, give it a rest with the dramatics," Raph said. "And Leo, get me the hell out of this chair. I've had my _beak_ taped shut, _makeup_ scrawled all over my face, my feet tickled with a _toothbrush_!"

"You tickled his feet with a toothbrush?" Leo questioned.

Paige sniffled. "Only because I wanted him to like me," she said in her best 'feel-sorry-for-me' tone of voice.

"Paige..." Leo said with a shake of his head that let her know he wasn't buying the act.

"Oh, fine!" She said, dropping it immediately. "Yeah, I tied up your stupid turtle brother and did all sorts of terrible things to him! He's an _idiot_! How could a 'ninja' let a sixteen year old girl with no experience get the drop on him? I mean _come on_!"

"Well... I guess that is sort of true," Leonardo said, scratching his chin.

"_Leo_!" Raph barked.

"And, yeah, I taped his big beak shut," Paige went on. "You're telling me you _wouldn't _if you had the chance? He's loud and annoying. Right?"

"At _times _I guess," Leo admitted.

Raphael's anger was rising again. He wiggled side-to-side in the chair.

"And did I tickle his feet? Sure. But he had fun. He laughed the whole time!"

"Uncontrollably!" Raph retorted.

"He used to _hate _having his feet tickled when we were younger," Leo said with a chuckle, glancing to Raph with a wistful look in his eye. "Me and Donny use to hold him down and do it. Made him so _mad_."

"Just some innocent fun, right!?" Paige said.

"Yeah... yeah it was," Leo told her.

Paige smiled and gave him a nod of her head. The girl rose, walking casually around the room as she went on, "So, yes. Me and Raphael had some fun. I'm April's niece. I've heard so much about you guys from her and about how much fun you had... I guess I just wanted to be part of it myself." She moved beside Raph's chair, ignoring his glaring eyes and barred teeth. "I don't have many friends. Stacy and Chloe there are my only ones. I guess I kind of wanted a _new _friend... even if I had to keep him quiet while he learned about my hard-to-take personality."

"You manipulative little-" he began until Paige's hand reached around his shoulder and clamped tightly over his beak. "_Mmmmmm_!"

"He's a tough guy, but I guess... so am I in a way," Paige told Leonardo. "And all I want is for the two of us to be friends... even if I have to _make _him learn to like me. Is that... is that terrible, Leonardo?"

"Oh, no, kid," Leo told her, crossing the room to lay a comforting hand on her shoulder. "We _all _want friends."

"_MMMMM!_" Raph mumbled into the devil-girl's hand.

"Even if the other person doesn't _want _to be our friend?" Paige asked.

"Raph here never wanted to be _any_one's friend, believe me," Leo said. "Not even his own brothers at times." He stroked his chin. "Hmm... you know what? We can _all _be friends! Come on, tie me up too! Let's see if I can get out faster than Raph."

"Okay!" Paige cheered, and when Leonardo pulled up a kitchen chair and plopped himself down in it, Paige finally released Raph and hurried to retrieve more clothesline.

"Leo, I swear to God if you let that punk tie you up, I'm going to _kick you_-"

"Uh, Paige," Leo interrupted. "Could you, uh..." He pointed at Raph with one hand and tapped his own beak with the other.

"Oh, yeah, sure," Paige said, grabbing the roll of duct tape.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me... Leo! I'm gonna-" Raphael protested, but Paige quickly ripped a piece free and gagged him. "_Mmmmm..._"

She tied Leo down to the chair, her two punk friends coming to help, and when it was done, the trio stepped back from him, set the oven timer on thirty minutes, and said 'Go!'. Leo was free in less than five.

"Raph!" Leo snapped. "Are you kidding me? These are the most _basic _knots I've ever come across!"

Raph squinted at Paige, and when the girl was sure Leo wasn't looking, she winked. "_MM-MM!_" He mumbled, shaking his head. The little punk had purposely left his brother's ropes loose. "_MM-MMMMM!_"

Leo shook his head in disappointment. "Really, Raph... you _need _the training, apparently. Paige... don't let him out of that until he learns to become a true ninja."

"Got it, Leo!" She said with a salute.

"Tell April to give me a ring when she gets back," he said, heading for the hall. "And Raph... really, step it up."

"_MMMPH!_ _MMMMMMMMMMPH!_" Raph pleaded with his brother not to leave him like he was, but then Leo was gone.

Paige stepped before the chair once the door was closed and locked by her devil-friends. "Now... where were we? Ah yes. Ticklish turtle tickle... time? Er... what was it? Oh, screw it! Get him girls!"

Raph was tickled into submission.

...again.

And the night was still young.


	4. Chapter 4

Raphael had endured three more bouts of 'Turtle Tickle Attack', as Paige labeled it, before the girls, apparently, finally had their fill of torturing him. The three teenaged devils wandered off into the living room, leaving Raph to stew in his ropes and gag, and turned on some movie from what Raph could make out was about handsome vampires kidnapping werewolf girls or something. Whatever it was, it held their attention fairly raptly.

Raph had tried struggling to break free in the kitchen chair a bit, but all the tickle torture had worn him out, and before too long, he found his head slumping to his chest, his eyes drooping shut, and then he fell asleep to the, somewhat-annoying, sound of some girl that kept shouting 'Edward!' from the TV.

He dreamed of surfing on an ocean of cheese pizza, with rock and roll music blaring from the boombox atop his shoulder.

It was Paige who woke him. Raph felt her little annoying hand tapping at his beak as he shook his head to clear the last bit of sleep from it and focused his eyes on her. She grinned and he grumbled. "I'm running out Raphie," she chirped. "Have to grab some more _food_, son! Stace and Chloe are going to babysit you while I'm gone. You behave for them, alright?"

Raph considered headbutting her. Instead, he grit his teeth beneath the tape on his mouth and simply shook his head in disgust.

"I hear about any problems when I get back and everyone's favorite game is coming back! Oh, that's right! Turtle Tickle Attack!" She cheered, raising a hand triumphantly before laughing and heading off to the hallway. A moment later, the apartment door slammed, and Raph was alone; Paige's two teenaged friends staring in at him from the living room.

He rolled his eyes and ignored their stares.

But after a moment, the two came rushing in around him.

"_MMF!_" He grunted, jerking in his ropes in surprise when they popped up before him.

"Okay, listen," Chloe began," there's something you need to know about Paige..."

"_Hmm?_" Raph questioned.

"She's... kind of crazy," Stacy answered.

"_MM-MM!?_" Raph mumbled, trying to repeat 'Crazy!?'

"Yeah," Chloe confirmed. "She's been doing really mean things like this to people for a long time. In fourth grade, she even talked a girl into chopping off all her own hair because the girl was wearing the same shirt as her!"

Raph gulped.

"She's never _hurt _anyone or anything," Stacy explained. "She just... well, Paige is Paige. She had a rough upbringing. Please don't be mad with her for doing all this to you. I mean we did it too, but that's only because she texted us _begging _us to join. And... uh, well, it was pretty fun. I mean... sorry."

"Yeah, you're a pretty cool dude," Chloe said. "Especially for putting up with all this. Well, you don't have a lot of choice in the matter, I guess, but..."

"But you handled it better than I would, that's for sure," Stacy said.

"Oh, no doubt," Chloe added.

"_MMMPH!_" Raph mumbled, motioning to the tape on his mouth with his eyes. He looked between the two girls, nodding his head. "_Mmmph! Mmf!_"

"He wants the gag off," Stacy told Chloe, the blond girl's face reddening. "Paige said we were absolutely not supposed to do that."

Chloe nodded. "True. Plus, he might start shouting again."

Raphael rolled his eyes. "_Grrmmmm_..."

"Look, just play along with her when she gets back," Stacy told him. "Stop fighting her, let her win, and she'll eventually get bored and let you free. ...probably."

_Probably!? _Raph thought, his eyes widening on the girl's own before him. "_MMMMMPH!_"

"Oh, let's just let him talk," Chloe said. Without waiting for Stacy's agreement, the dreadlock-headed girl reached to his taped beak and peeled the gag away, and Raph was pleased to see she did it much more slowly and carefully than Paige had the numerous times she'd gagged and ungagged him by then.

"No shouting or we tape you back up, okay?" Stacy asked.

If one more person threatened to gag him, Raph's shell would likely explode in a rage. He ignored the girl's warning. "How _'crazy' _is April's little punk niece exactly?"

Chloe and Stacy shared a look. "Well... she did get checked into a mental ward last summer."

"_What_!?" Raph snapped.

"Shh!" Chloe hushed him. "Yeah, alright, she was in a mental ward. But it wasn't her fault! She locked our English teacher in a closet for the day because she failed Paige. I mean, did she go too far? Sure. And when slipped her cell phone under the closet door and made Mrs. White call her son and tell him she didn't love him anymore, was that _way _too far? ...well, yeah."

"And when she flattened Mrs. White's tires the next day it was _really _too far," Stacy added.

"Oh my God..." Raph muttered. "I've been captured by a psycho!"

"Oooo don't use that word around her," Chloe told him. "Last guy who did that got duct-taped to the flagpole outside our school."

Raph fixed the girls with a pleading look. "You _have _to untie me. Girls! Listen, just untie me and you can say I got out on my own!"

"She'd never buy that, though!" Stacy said. "She _practices _making knots! She _knows _you can't get away!"

"I don't _care_!" Raph shouted. "You can't leave me tied up like this when she comes back! You just admitted she's nuts! If you don't untie me, _your _both nuts, too!"

The girls glanced at one another uncertainly.

"Come on!" Raph begged, wiggling side to side and stomping his feet. "Untie me! _Untie_ me! Come on! _Hurry_! Untie me!"

"What do we do?" Stacy asked her friend.

Chloe's eyes moved to his and narrowed. "Uh... gag him?"

"No!" Raph protested. "No more with the duct tape! I've been _gagged _for so long, I'm forgetting the English language!" He took a breath, forcing himself calm. "Look, I'm not yelling, there's no need to get the tape, just please for the love of all that is good and true in this world untie me from this chair before your insane friend gets back and we'll forget this whole thing."

"Maybe he's right, Chloe," Stacy said. "He's been through a lot. His poor feet were tickled into the next dimension!"

"Yes!" Raph agreed.

"Well... we did force makeup on him and make funny faces at him behind his back," Chloe admitted.

"Yes!" Raph cheered. "...wait, what? Funny faces?"

"Er, never mind that," Chloe quickly added.

"Alright," Stacy said, nodding, an excited expression rising to her face. "Let's do it! Let's untie him and we'll just deal with Paige later."

Chloe gulped. "Well... alright, but let's make sure we leave the state for a few months after this."

"Of course!"

A surge of hope swam through Raph's body. "Yes! Thank you, girls! Now hurry!"

They both knelt beside the kitchen chair he was bound to and set to work releasing him. Stacy's nose scrunched up at she twisted at a knot. "Geeze, Paige's ropework is rough."

"Maybe scissors is a better idea," Chloe suggested, struggling with a knot of her own.

"Yeah! Scissors! Hurry!" Raph pleaded, stomping his feet in excitement.

The girls rushed behind the counter, fished through the kitchen drawers, and got a hold of a pair of scissors. They hurried back to him and had just made it to the rear of the chair when the apartment door swung back on its hinges.

"Cut it!" Raph pleaded, but when he looked back, both Chloe and Stacy were staring forward, expressions of dread frozen on their faces.

Paige came sauntering into the room carrying a brown bag, whistling a cheerful little tune as she did. When her eyes fell on the three of them huddled up in the kitchen, she abruptly stopped whistling and a frown took her face. "Uh.. what the hell is this?" She looked at Raph. "Why is his gag off? What- Are you holding _scissors_, Chloe!?"

"He made us do it, Paige!" Stacy wailed.

"We weren't really going to free him!" Chloe added.

Paige fumed. She threw the bag down on the kitchen table and dug inside. "Well... looks like its a good thing I got all this tape," she said, pulling out a roll of thick, white, tape. She threw it to the two of them. "Get him out of that chair and start wrapping him up: ankles to shoulders. We're making ourselves a turtle-mummy. Then... I'll deal with you two backstabbers."

Raphael was hoisted up out of the chair, despite his shouts and protests, and made to stand in the center of the kitchen, teetering dangerously and unable to balance in his ropes. Paige held her sadistic smirk on him as she gave orders to the other two. She had them unravel the tape and wind it around his ankles. When they were tightly together, she had them raise the wrap higher and higher, every inch of Raphael getting buried in mounds of sticky tape. He grumbled and groaned and threatened Paige every step of the way, but his words only seemed to bring her more joy. Chloe and Stacy finished wrapping him at the tops of his shoulders, and when it was done, Raph looked down to see he _had _in fact became a mummy. He couldn't budge an inch.

"L-O-L!" Paige cheered. "Perfect! _And _your little feetsies are still exposed and ready for another 'Turtle Tickle Attack' should you start acting up!" She laughed. "We shouldn't have to worry about that, though. We're stuffing _you_ in the closet."

"The closet!?" Raph snapped. "No! No way! This is ridiculous! Who do you think you are!?"

But with three teenage girls working against one mummified turtle, there was little he could do to stop them as they forced him to hop his way down the hall and into the coat closet indented in its side. Paige flipped the light switch as Raph was shoved forward. The closet was a tight squeeze, April's hats on the tops rack, her shoes on the floor, and her coats and sweaters hanging in tight bunches from hangers. Raph's bound feet landed atop one of April's slippers, and he tumbled back against the wall, unable to move his arms or legs to stop himself. Paige's laughter came over his shoulder as she spun him around so he was facing the closet door.

"You aren't going to get away with this," he growled at her.

"Spoken like a true damsel-in-distress," Paige taunted, shaking her head. "Don't worry. You'll have some company so you don't get too lonely in here soon enough."

"Company?" Stacy questioned.

As Paige closed the door on Raph, he saw that patented mischievous grin of her's turn on her own friends.

Fifteen minutes later, the doors opened again.

Both Chloe and Stacy were now mummified ankles-to-shoulders the same as Raph, Paige between them with her hands around their shoulders and a triumphant look upon her face. "Here's your little 'helpers'!" She told Raphael. "Come to keep you company!"

Stacy sighed. "This is so messed up, Paige."

"Shhh, in you go," Paige hushed her, shoving her friend forward.

"Can't we talk this over?" Chloe asked.

"Nope," Paige said, shoving Chloe next.

The two hopped their way forward and squeezed in at either side of Raphael, packing them all tightly shoulder-to-shoulder in the closet, unable to move so much as a muscle against one another.

Raph looked between the two of them before narrowing his eyes on Paige outside the closet door. "Are you serious? You're just gonna _leave _us in here like this!?"

"Oh no, Raphie, I would never leave _you _like that," Paige told him sweetly. She lifted the roll of white tape before her and shook it. "_You_ have to be kept nice and quiet."

"_PAIGE!_" He managed to shout before she leaned in and buried his beak in tape.

"Bye-bye!" She cheered, waving as she slammed the door shut on the three of them.

A moment later, the light went out, and they were left in complete darkness.

"...well this sucks," Chloe said.

"Yup," Stacy agreed.

A moment of silence passed in the blackness.

"...Edward is cooler than Jacob," Chloe said.

"Nuh-uh!" Stacy protested.

"Yeah, prove me wrong!"

"Okay! I know a _lot _of ways to prove you wrong."

"Name 'em then!"

"I _will_!"

Raph stared forward in the dark, the two bickering girls filling his head with nonsense he did not understand. There was only one thing left to do, so he did it. He threw his head back, closed his eyes, and screamed. "_MMMMMMMMMMMPH!_"


	5. Chapter 5

"No, Stacy, you're still flat," Chloe said into the darkness of the closet.

"Really?" Stacy asked. "Huh. Let me try again." She cleared her throat and began singing. "_Baby, baby, baby, OH! It's like Baby, baby, baby, OOOOH!_ ...better?"

"I guess a little," Chloe admitted. "But try _this_ - _Baby, baby, baby OOH! _See? You really have to get loud for that last part."

"_OOOH!?_" Stacy tried.

"_OOOH!_" Chloe demonstrated again.

The two began singing at the same time, terribly off-pitch from one another. "_Baby, baby, baby, OH!_"

Raphael balled his hands into fists somewhere beneath the dozens and dozens of layers of tape mummifying him and found himself wishing his _ears _had been taped shut too. He wiggled side to side, grunting and mumbling from his taped beak to try and get them to knock it off, but the girls went on singing loudly enough to drown his muffled protests out. Raph closed his eyes and began banging his head off the wall behind him.

After a few minutes of the worst singing he'd ever heard, the closet door yanked open so suddenly, both girls screamed beside him.

Paige stared in at them. "April's coming home," she said, frowning.

"Oh," Chloe replied. "Well... I guess... you have to let us... go now?"

"Uh, _heck _no!" Paige shouted. "I'm cutting you two out of your wraps, but Raphie here," she said, winking at him despite his glare, "can't go! I want to _keep_ him!"

"_Keep _him?" Stacy questioned.

"Yeah, like a pet?"

"_MMM!?_" Raph grunted.

"I mean he is a turtle," Paige went on. "Why shouldn't I get to have him?"

"Uh, Paige," Chloe began carefully. "He might be a turtle, but... he's also, like, a person. You can't just keep a person as a pet."

Raphael could have sworn he saw Paige's left eye twitch. It scared him. "Says who?" The girl asked. "_You_?"

"No, not _me_!" Chloe pleaded.

Paige turned on Stacy. "_You _then?"

"Nuh-uh, Paige!" Stacy begged.

"Well, then doesn't sound like we have a problem, does it?" Paige asked. She reached to the studded belt around her waist and pulled out a butcher knife. It had started raining outside, and from the end of the hallway, thunder roared and lightning flashed in the window just as the knife came up, painting Paige in a terrifying flash of yellow light.

Chloe and Stacy screamed again.

Paige frowned. "I'm just cutting you free, dorks," she explained, leaning in to the closet, and slicing the sides of her friends mummy-wraps and setting them free. When it was done, the two girls breathed sighs of relief and swiped at their sweaty brows. Paige set her sadistic grin on Raph. "We just have to keep turtle-toes here quiet and out of sight when April gets back. Then I can work on getting him home."

"_MM-MM!_" Raph protested. The idea of being hauled off to this crazy punk's house was enough to make him start wiggling frantically in his wrap again.

"Mm-_hm_!" Paige retorted. "You're gonna be my sweet little pet turtle, Raphie! I'll feed you pizza every day! I'll read you bedtime stories! I'll tickle you senseless when I'm bored! It's going to be so much _fun_!"

"_MMMMMPH!_"

"Lug him out of there," Paige commanded her friends. "You two are going to keep him in the bathroom, and when my Aunt comes home, I'm going to tell her you came over, Chloe, but you got a little sick from the pizza and you're throwing up. Then when Aunt April goes to sleep? I'm turtlenapping Raphie here! Hee-hee! So much fun!"

Raph shook his head. "_Mm-mm!_"

"Well, what are you waiting for? Get 'em hopping!"

Stacy and Chloe shared a concerned look, briefly set the expression on Raph between them, but took hold of his sides anyway as Paige stood watching, hands on her hips, from outside the closet. They forced his weight forward, and Raph had no choice but to start hopping, or he would tumble to the floor. They guided him out into the hall, all three of the girls ignoring his furious mumbling as they did, and led him into a series of quick, desperate, hops as they forced him back to the kitchen, around the corner, through the living room, and into the bathroom.

The girls shoved him down onto the toilet seat and stood around him in a circle. When Raph's eyes found Paige's, the girl laughed. "Okay, now you two just _keep - him - quiet_! If April finds out about this... well, let's just say you're both going down with me if that happens. Got it?"

Chloe and Stacy nodded fearfully at their leader.

"Good," Paige told them. "And _you _behave, Raphie, and there might be some more pizza for you if you do. Would you like that?"

Raph glowered up at his captor, grinding his teeth.

"Ooo so silent!" Paige chirped. "Very good! But I wanna hear what you have to say." She ripped the tape from his lips even quicker than the last time she'd done so.

"_Ow_!" Raph yelped.

Paige shrugged and quickly shoved the gag back down over his beak. "Well, if that's all you have to say for yourself..."

"_GRMPH!_" Raph grunted furiously.

She patted his head. "Can't wait til I turtlenap you and get you home!"

"Uh, Paige, about that..." Chloe started.

"Yeah, that's... wrong and stuff," Stacy added.

"Why!? Paige snapped. "He's a _turtle_! He doesn't have the same rights as us!"

"Whoa!" Chloe exclaimed. "Paige, that's, like, _crazy _racist!"

Paige frowned. "He's not a different _race_, dumbo, he's a different species."

"Well then its _specist_!" Stacy pleaded.

"Look, I want him," Paige told them. "And I'm gonna _get _him. End of story. Now do as I told you and keep him quiet until April goes to bed or you two will be _very _sorry you crossed me. Got it?"

The two girls gulped and fearfully shook their heads. "Yes, Paige."

Paige winked at Raphael once more before turning, strolling back into the living room, and slamming the bathroom door shut on the three of them. Raphael immediately looked up to the girls and began frantically mumbling and writhing in his binds. Before, he was angry. _Now_, the girl was starting to scare him.

"She's gone too far this time, right?" Stacy asked.

"Are you serious?" Chloe asked. "Hell yeah she's gone too far! You heard her! She wants to turtlenap Raphael here and take him home as a pet! That's crazy even for _Paige_!"

"Well, I mean, I understand her reasoning," Stacy admitted. "He is pretty cute."

"Yuck! He's ugly!" Chloe said.

"No he's not!" Stacy defended. "And don't say that in front of him! He can't talk but he can still _hear _you know!"

"Oh, uh, sorry, dude," Chloe said, her cheeks reddening as she forced a smile down at him.

Raphael rolled his eyes.

"So what do we do?" Stacy asked.

"Well we can't just cut him free," Chloe explained. "Paige will kill us! We have to figure out a way to get him out of here that looks like he did it himself."

"_Mmmm_," Raph moaned, wiggling his lips around beneath the tape.

Stacy reached for the gag. "He wants to talk. I'm just going to-"

"No!" Chloe shouted, slapping her hand away. "If he starts shouting, Paige will hear him and then we're screwed!"

"He wouldn't do that to us," Stacy said. "He's our friend."

"What? No he's not!"

"Yeah-huh!"

"Nuh-_uh_!"

They both looked to Raphael and stared.

With his beak still taped firmly shut, he could only stare back.

"See!" Chloe said. "Told you!"

"Yeah, that really wasn't a very friendly look he gave us, huh?"

"_MMMPH!_" Raph grumbled. He hadn't even realized he was _giving _a look! His face just _was _that way! It wasn't his fault!

Outside the bathroom door, voices started speaking. After a moment, they neared closer to the door and Raphael could make out one was Paige and the other was definitely April. His eyes widened and his heart raced at the chance for escape. Chloe and Stacy must have seen the change of mood come over him though, because they both dove for him just as he was beginning to shout into his gag and stomp his feet. They tackled him to the bathroom floor, wrapping his already-mummified body in their arms and legs and clamping all four of their hands over his beak in attempt to further quiet him down. Raph wiggled in their hold and sent angry mumbles in April's direction, but the girls had, for the most part, successfully silenced him. His eyes found theirs beside his head and squinted.

"Sorry," Stacy whispered, flashing a toothy and apologetic grin.

"Ow!" Chloe whisper-shouted. "His stupid shell is crushing on my foot!"

"_My _feet have been crushed under his shell the whole time!" Stacy retorted. "Just hold him a little longer till April goes!"

Raphael pleaded his muffled protests beneath their hands.

"Shhhhh!" Chloe hissed.

Stacy sniffed at his head. "He kinda smells like pickles."

"What? Let me see." Chloe leaned in to sniff him too. "Wow. That's actually kind of freaky. _Dell _pickles, right?"

"Omg, yeah!"

"_Mmph!_" Raph grunted.

"SHH!" They both shushed him.

Outside the door, the room beyond had quieted down, and a moment later, Raph heard the _slam _of April's bedroom door. His muscles untensed as disappointment coursed through his entire body and he slumped into the girls arms, no longer fighting.

"Raphael? Uh-oh! Turtle-depression!" Stacy cried. "Oh no!"

Chloe stared at him. "He _does_ seem sad... Alright, you know what? Screw it. We'll get you near the door, turtle-dude. When Paige opens it, charge her and hop your way to freedom! We'll try to 'accidentally' slow her down. Hurry!"

The girls scrambled off Raphael, dug their hands under his shell, and hoisted him to his feet. He wobbled a bit, but they helped him keep his balance. His eyes flicked between the two of them hopefully.

"Hop like the wind and be free you magnificent turtle!" Stacy cheered, and when Raph rolled his eyes and looked down at his gagged beak, wiggling his lips around beneath it, she added, "Oh, right. You still can't talk. Let me just..." She reached up and ripped the tape away.

_"Mmmm-OW! _Alright, how exactly am I supposed to just _hop _away?" Raphael asked them.

The girls were staring at one another with matching expressions of perplexity when the bathroom door's knob started turning. They winced, took hold of Raph's sides and marched him forward to the door just as Paige swung it open. When the girl saw him hopping her way in a relentless path of turtle-power, she yelped and put her hands up. Raphael barreled right over her, and Chloe and Stacy 'accidentally' tripped ontop of the psychotic girl, pinning her beneath them.

"_Argh_!" Paige grunted. "Get off me you idiots! He's getting away!"

"He overpowered us!" Chloe explained.

"We couldn't stop him!" Stacy added.

"Just get _off_!"

Raphael wasn't sticking around to see if they listened or not. He hopped out of the living room, through the kitchen, down the hall, and leaned forward to take the apartment door's knob between his teeth and twist it. The door swung open and he went right on hopping for his life outside. Somewhere behind him, Paige roared, and a chill took his shell.

"Crazy chick!" Raph muttered, snapping his head around the hall, looking for an escape route. His eyes found a stairwell marked with a red 'Exit' sign, and his legs went to work hopping him forward immediately. By the time he reached it, the bottoms of his feet were sore and his thighs were burning from the exertion. He looked down the steps, but the thought of taking a fall down them made him lean back. He looked _up _the steps, but didn't think he could make fast enough progress.

Paige's shouting drew closer at his back.

Raph leaped into the nook of the stairwell between the doors and the corner, wedging himself in the shadows there. Paige came barreling in a second later, her face red and her teeth barred. From his hidden position, Raph held his breath as he watched her looking the stairs both up and down before growling in frustration and bolting down to the next floor shouting "_Raphie!_"

When her shouting trailed off, Raph let his breath out, and hopped his way back into the hall. His feet bounced off the carpeting underfoot as he made his way all the way back to April's apartment. There was an old woman with puffy gray hair in a nightgown walking into the door across the hall with her mail in hand. Raph leaped right next to her, and when she turned and saw him, she screamed.

"Listen lady, you gotta _help _me! I'm being turtlenapped!" He pleaded.

"_EEK!_ _Demon!_" She shouted, swatted him in the head with her mail, and rushed inside her apartment to slam and lock the door.

"_RAAAPH!_" Paige's voice came thundering forth from the stairwell. Raph turned his horror-stricken eyes back that way to see the teenage girl standing beneath the 'Exit' sign holding a giant net-on-a-pole. The red light from the sign bathed her in a terrifying, crimson, glow as she stared down the hall at him, panting between her barred teeth. She pointed at him, smirked insanely, and sprinted forward.

Raph's terror reached new heights as his heart hammered in his chest. Then, hands took hold of his chest and down by his legs, and he looked to see Chloe and Stacy lifting him with some effort between them, Stacy tucking his feet under her arm and Chloe wrestling to get his shoulders pinned to her body, and then they were lugging him down the haul in a mad dash as if he were luggage.

"_Traitors!_" Paige shouted after them in pursuit. "_Get back here!_"

The girls carried Raphael between them, huffing and puffing and having to readjust to keep hold of his weight every few steps, and Raph quickly realized they were going to get caught in no time. "In there!" He shouted, looking forward to an upcoming storage closet. The girls listened, angling him awkwardly around the bend of the doorway, dropping him to the ground atop his shell, and spinning back to slam and lock the door behind them just as Paige began pounding on the other side.

They screamed and stumbled back to the floor next to Raph, scrambling beside him and propping him up against the wall to cower behind his shell. Raphael squirmed in his mummy-prison, but could still not budge, and there was no time for the girls to get him loose - Paige was breaking her way in!

The door _cracked_ as something took it from the hall.

Stacy screamed. "We're finished!"

"_Through!_" Chloe wailed.

The door _rumbled _again.

"It's okay," Raph tried reassuring them. "She can't be _that _mad at us... right?"

A piece of the door at its center splintered apart as Paige drove the tip of the net through from the other side, prompting terrified screams from all _three _of them, Raph included. The teenage girl stuck her face in the newly-formed hole and smiled madly at them.

"_Theeeeeeeere's RAPHIE!_" She cheered.

Raph did not care for this.


	6. Chapter 6

"Paige, wait!" Chloe begged.

April's teenaged niece did not, however. Instead, she wrenched back her net's pole, shouted an insane warcry, and drove the butt between the cracked door of the apartment's utility closet. Wood went splintering forward to shower down around Raphael and the two terrified girls seated behind him, hiding and peeking their eyes over the top of his shell. Paige's face appeared once again in the hole she'd created, and her toothy grin, despite how terrifying her desire to break in, remained.

"Just hand over the Raph, and no one gets pinched," Paige explained, trying to angle her elbow into the hole and reach the locked doorknob. Thankfully, it was still just out of reach of her grasping fingers, but if she made the hole any wider, she'd get it.

"_Pinched_!?" Stacy echoed, cowering a bit more behind Raph's shell.

"Oh yeah!" Paige cheered. "You two are in for quite a pinching if you don't come to your senses and give up that turtle!"

"Ooo," Chloe whined. "Paige's pinches are the worst, Stace. Remember when she pinched Eric Reen last summer and his whole arm was black and blue for a week! Maybe… maybe we give up the Raph."

"Don't give up the Raph so easily!" Raphael pleaded, shaking his head. "She's bluffing!"

Paige lifted her hand to the hole so they could see her fingers start to snap together in a brutal pinching motion.

Stacy gulped loudly in his ear. "She really means it. If we don't have you over, Raphael, she's going to take us down to Pinch-a-dise City!"

"And it is _not _a place you want to visit!" Chloe added.

"She can't get in though!" Raph explained.

"_HIYA!_" Paige wailed and drove her net into the door. The edges of the hole cracked and looked ready to burst at any moment. Paige looked back in on them. "I'm going to geeeeeet you, Raphie! One way or another, you will be my little pet turtle!"

Raph wiggled about in his mummy-wrap. "Girls, just start trying to unravel me!" He told the teenaged girls gripping fearfully to his shell. "You can't give me up to that little psycho punk!"

Both Chloe and Stacy gasped and brought their hands to their mouths.

Paige's eyes narrowed through the door's hole. "...what did you just call me?" She asked in a quiet, calm, voice.

"Uh…" Raphael stammered; he'd suddenly remembered the girls' warning not to call April's demonic niece 'crazy' or 'psycho' or anything. He stared at Paige, unable to think of anything. Her eye twitched. Raph gulped. She grinned. He did the only thing left to do. "_Heeeeelp! Anyone out there in the apartment! Help! There's a crazy girl trying to turtlenap me!_" If his brothers ever heard him calling for help, he'd never hear the end of it, but what other choice did Raph have now?

"_CRAZY!?_" Paige cried. "I am _not _crazy! Would a crazy person do _this_?" The girl started making funny faces into the hole and pulling on her own hair.

"That's _exactly _what a crazy person would do!" Raph said. "_Heeeelp!_"

"Grrr," Paige growled. "Be quiet you noisy little turtle! I'm going to tickle you so good when I get you, Raphie! _Raphie_! Stop shouting!" She wrenched back her net and drove it into the door again. The cracks deepened, but did not yet break.

"Stacy, look!" Chloe shouted, and Raphael turned back to see the girl pointing to the very rear of the closet, where a metal hatch was carved into the wall beside the shelves and brooms. "I think that's a trash shoot!"

"But we don't have any trash!" Stacy replied, frowning.

"No, but we have a turtle in desperate need of an escape route!" Chloe explained.

"You want to stuff me in a trash shoot!?" Raphael shouted.

"Do you have a better plan?"

Raph thought about it. Outside, Paige had pulled a strand of hair to her mouth to chew on as she stared in at Raph, one eye slightly wider than the other. "Well what are we waiting for! Get me in that trash shoot!"

"No no no no!" Paige whined, stomping her feet. She stuck her arm in the hole to try and get at the handle again. A piece had cracked loose and her fingers could now _just _graze it, but were slipping off every time she tried getting a grip.

Chloe and Stacy came out of hiding and hoisted Raph to his feet between them. They quickly guided him to the rear of the closet. When they arrived and slammed open the hatch to reveal a dark, winding, tunnel within, Paige's fingers finally closed around the handle and released the lock. The door swung back and Paige stood framed in the doorway, her hair in sweaty tangles around her wide, eager, eyes. She lifted the net over her head and grinned maniacally. "RAPHIE!"

She charged.

Raph, with the teenaged girls at his sides help, leaped up into the trash shoot head first-

-and got stuck halfway in, the mound of his shell wedging between the narrow entrance of the hatch. "Crap!" He shouted, his voice now echoing wildly off the aluminum prison his head was stuck in. Behind him, he could hear Chloe and Stacy yelping in pain and one of them shouted, "Ow, Paige! Stop pinching!"

Raph wiggled side to side, squeezing himself further and further into the shoot. Hands, small but firm, grabbed his ankles and pulled back the other way. Raphael jerked his knees, trying desperately to escape the hold, but he couldn't get loose. Just when he was about to give up and accept his fate to be turtlenapped by some crazy teenaged girl, he heard Paige yelp, presumably because of something Chloe and Stacy had done to her, and the grip on his ankles was removed. Raph squirmed forth, managed his shell through the hatch, and began to plummet down the shoot. Something grabbed for his foot at the last moment, but it only got a hold of the tape that was mummifying him instead, so as he sailed through the dark tunnel, he felt his mummy-wrap unraveling quickly from his ankles upwards.

By the time he crashed into a bed of trash bags in the alleyway outside the apartment, he was no longer mummified. The ropes Paige had first tied his arms and waist up with remained, however, but at least he could stand and move his legs freely now.

Raph rolled off the trash and landed at the base of the mountain of bags on his feet. He stood and surveyed the dark night before him, pulling a deep breath of crispy New York air. It smelled like freedom. ...and trash. Rain was lightly drizzling upon the city streets, and Raph's feet soaked as he went splashing through the alleyway's puddles to its end.

He reached a lamppost that marked the end of the alley and the beginning of April's block, leaning beside it to catch his breath. He had only just began to feel ready to go running of to the nearest sewer manhole when movement caught his attention further down the street. He turned to see Paige flying his way on a skateboard! Her net was held high over her head as the teenager sailed forward, her board's tires rumbling off the pavement beneath them. "RAAAAPHIE!" She shouted, taking practice swings with the net.

"Oh what the-!?" Raph snapped, unable to believe the tenacity of the crazy little punk that was now laughing evily as she skateboarded her way closer. He spun on his heel, eyed up the end of April's road where a manhole cover awaited to carry him back to the safety of his brothers, and took off in a desperate sprint.

He ran past a group of leather jacker-wearing guys in their twenties, leaning up against a building, smoking cigarettes and tossing empty beer bottles to shatter further down the road, laughing hysterically every time the _crash _sounded off. One of them had a bright blue mohawk, and when he saw Raphael go sprinting past in the middle of the street, he shouted, "Ruuuun, Turtle! Ruuuuun!"

This was, apparently, hilarious to his punk friends.

Raphael made his way to the manhole, dropped to his knees beside it to twist around and work his bound hands under the rim, and hoisted it up. The sweet, sweet, smell of New York's sewer system greeted him, and Raph felt a smile take his beak. He'd made it. After his nightmare of a night, he was finally free.

His foot was just about on the first rung of the ladder when a shout caught his attention back the way he'd came. "Nice board, little girl!" Mohawk jeered, prompting more giggles from the pack of hyenas around him. "So nice… it's _mine_!" The man leaped out to wrap his forearm around Paige just as she was almost past him. She yelped and lifted off her board into his arms. The skateboard sailed right into the waiting hands of another of the men, who picked it up and raised it over his head triumphantly.

Paige was much shorter than Mohawk, so when she kicked her legs to try and get free, they only flailed uselessly in front of her. "Let _go_, you dork!" She shouted, trying to bite at the man's arm. "Put me down! _Now_!"

"Quite a mouth on this little thing," Mohawk said, grinning as Paige writhed helplessly in his arm. "Maybe we otta shut her up, huh fellas?"

"Let me go!" Paige yelled.

Mohawks hyenas chuckled as they began closing in on her, tightening a circle of leather-jackets until their leader and his squirming prisoner were completely enclosed.

Raph looked down into the manhole, looked down at his _freedom_. He sighed.

"Get off me!" Paige demanded.

Mohawk laughed. His arm came up to strike her-

-and Raphael's flying foot crashed across his jaw.

The gang of them were stunned, and Raphael used the moment of surprise in his favor. He shouted, sending them back in fear, and dropped to his shell to launch into a spinning kick at the nearest one's ankles. Raph's attack dropped him. Two of his buddies watched, frowned, and leapt in to pounce on Raph while he was down. Raphael kicked his heels against the pavement, launching him into a flip back to his feet, and spun a devastating roundhouse kick across their jaws. The hyenas went sailing back to _crash _into a parked car's hood.

"Forget this!" Mohawk cried, turned, and broke into a run for his life.

The rest had their confidence shaken by their retreating leader, and were quick to follow suit, and after only a few short moments, only Raphael and Paige were left standing beneath the streetlight, the rain softly drizzling around them.

Paige was staring up at Raph with her mouth agape. "You… you saved me?"

Raph rolled his eyes. "Yeah, kid. I'm a Ninja Turtle. It's what we do."

"But… but I did so many mean things to you! Turtle Tickle Attack! Remember?"

"_Yeah _I remember!" He snapped. "You're… a deranged little chick! You also happen to be April's niece, though. And April… she's family. I guess that makes you family too."

Paige's lip quivered. Her hands clutched together at her chest. Her brow upturned. The corner's of her eyes moistened. She bit her lip and smiled up at Raph lovingly.

"Uh…" Raph began awkwardly. He didn't really know what to say, so he simply nodded his head, turned, and headed back to the manhole to finally go home.

He'd made it three steps when Paige's net came down around his head and shoulders, trapping him.

"_What the-!?_" Raph yelped. "_Paige!_"

"What?" Paige asked as casually as if nothing had happened. "I still want to turtlenap you. Actually… even _more _now. You're really tough. Maybe you can train me?"

"NO!" Raph shouted, wiggling in the net. "Get this off! PAIGE!"

April's niece simply began whistling a cheerful little tune as she dragged Raphael back down the road. "Maybe since you were so nice to save me, I'll try and turtlenap one of your brothers!" She chirped. "So you can have company! What do you think?"

Raphael was so angry, the only word he could form as he was helplessly dragged down the road, bound and netted, was, "_PAAAAAAIGE!_"


	7. Chapter 7

"And then he was all like '_HYA_!'" Paige shouted, leaping into the air and lashing her foot out to her side before clumsily plopping back down to the floor. "And then, and then he was like '_HI-YA!_'" She sent a flurry of kicks before the two, wide-eyed, girls before her.

Chloe and Stacy's mouths were agape as they watched the display of faux-kung-fu. "Cooool!" Stacy cooed, watching carefully as Paige sent another poorly guided kick into the air. "He beat up all those goons even with his arms all tied up?"

"Yep," Paige answered, lifting her chin a bit and smiling. "And he did it _all _for me. I knew he wanted to be my little pet turtle protector! I just _knew _it! He even said, like, that he thought I was pretty cool, too."

"_MM-MM!_" Raph mumbled, shaking his head. Paige had replaced the tape over his mouth before guiding him back into April's apartment beneath her net, so he couldn't start shouting and wake her sleeping Aunt up. Now he sat, still bound from the waist up in ropes, in April's kitchen, unable to do a thing beside listen to Paige's exaggerated telling of his rescue of her.

"He said it," Paige insisted. "It was in the heat of the moment. He was all, like, 'You're pretty cool and tough Paige.'. He's a real ninja, I guess, and since he thinks I'm so awesome… that _kinda _makes me a ninja too."

"Wow… ninja Paige!" Stacy cheered, lifting an arm over her head.

"Shh!" Paige quickly shushed her. "My aunt is still sleeping!"

"Dumby," Chloe said, elbowing her blond-headed friend.

"Now, about that pinching I owe you two little backstabbers for trying to take my Raphie away…" Paige began, lifting her fingers before her and snapping her index and thumb together menacingly.

The girls, who both already had large, purple, bruises on their forearms, were quick to cover up what skin they could and shake their heads. "Come on, Paige!" Chloe pleaded. "You already got us! We're sorry!"

"We won't do it again!" Stacy added, wincing as Paige's snapping fingers neared. "We promise! He turtle-tricked!"

"Hmmm…" Paige hummed, rubbing at her chin as she narrowed her eyes on Raphael. "He _is _pretty turtle-tricky…"

Raph rolled his eyes.

"Fine. No pinching. For now," she added with a stern look. "Anyway, I'm going to need your arms in good condition if we're going to do this."

"Do… _what_?" Chloe asked.

"Form a group of bad-guy-fighting, all-girl, ninjas of course!" Paige cheered.

"Whoa!" Stacy exclaimed.

"Cool!" Chloe added.

"_Mmph?_" Raph grunted.

"Yep, and our favorite turtle-pal here, Raphie, is going to me our mentor and instructor!" Paige went on. "Once he's made us all as badass as him, we're going to clean these streets up, one loser at a time! _HYA_!" She shouted, jumping up and kicking her foot out again. Her toe clipped the edge of the table and sent a glass tumbling to its side. It rolled on its curved surface to the edge, and Paige made a mad leap to try and catch it-

-but missed. It _shattered _against the tiled floor.

"Paige?" April's voice called from behind her bedroom door. "Is that you?"

"_MMMMPH!_" Raphael answered instead, writhing in his ropes, stomping his feet, desperate for someone to finally free him from this insane nightmare he'd stumbled into.

"Uh-oh." Stacy gulped.

"Crap!" Paige whisper-shouted, her eyes widening on her aunt's door. She cleared her throat and composed herself before sending her reply, "Yes, Aunt April! Sorry! Just dropped a glass! Everything's fine! No need to come out here!"

Chloe and Stacy had taken up position at Raph's sides, their hands working frantically to clamp over his beak and further silence his muffled shouting.

"Are you sure?" April's voice returned. "It's noisy out there, Paige. Do you have company? Hold on, I'm coming out."

"No! Wait!" Paige shouted, looking around for somewhere to, presumably, stash Raphael.

But it was too late. The bedroom door opened, and April came walking out from the darkness within in her nightdress and socks. She rubbed her fists against her eyes, looked at the sight before her, and did it again. When she'd adjusted to the lightning, her mouth fell agape. "What the-"

"Don't be mad, Aunt April!" Paige pleaded. "We were just having some fun is all! No need to yell at me or anything… right?"

"_Mmmph! MMMPH!_" Raph roared into the tape sealing his mouth shut. He nodded for April to come help him. Chloe and Stacy released him and stepped timidly back into the kitchen in retreat.

"Raph, are you alright?" April asked, stomping across the living room to join them.

Raph sighed, but nodded his head anyway.

April turned a glare on her niece and shook her head. "Paige… why did you do this to Raphael!"

Paige lowered her head, her cheeks flushing with chagrin. She flicked her eyes to Raph, and Raph, though no one could see it, grinned beneath his gag. Paige shrugged and pouted her lips. "He was being a meanie and stuff… right guys!?" She shouted, turning back hopefully to her friends for support.

Chloe and Stacy only forced weak smiles at April and shrugged themselves.

"...backstabbers…" Paige muttered, kicking her sneaker off the tiled floor and leaving a scuff mark.

April threw up her hands in frustration. "God, Paige, what am I going to do with you? Alright… alright you can _start _by getting him outof those ropes!"

"Fine!" Paige snapped in defeat. She pouted her lips even further and moved before Raphael. Raph nodded his head and leaned forward so she could remove the tape from his mouth, but the little punk only gave him a dirty look and moved around to the back of the chair. Raph grumbled and rolled his eyes.

"And _you _two!" April went on angrily, turning her frown on Chloe and Stacy. "Don't you have _homes _to go to?"

"Yes, April," Stacy answered.

"Sorry, April," Chloe added.

The three of them stood looking at each other for a moment until April threw up her hands again. "Well?"

"Oh, right. Come on, Stace," Chloe said, elbowing her friend.

The girls disappeared down the hall, flashing Raphael and April with apologetic smiles as they scooted past.

"Hurry up, Paige," April said when the three of them were alone. "Get him free and then you and I are going to have a _loooong _talk."

"I _hate _long talks!" Paige protested behind Raph's shoulder.

April shook her head, crossing into the kitchen and starting up a pot of coffee. "Oh, I know, Paige. That's why this one is going to be _extra-_long. I can't believe you _tied-up _Raphael like that! Was he here when I came home before."

"_Mm-hm," _Raph confirmed, nodding his head.

"Did they have you all tied up like that in the bathroom, Raph?" April questioned.

Raph nodded.

April took a deep breath, closing her eyes and laying a hand on her brow. "Paige…"

"I'm working as fast as I can!" Her niece shouted. "I tie good knots, it's not my fault!"

"No, nothing ever is, is it?" April asked, stepping around the counter to the kitchen table. "And of course you put a gag on his mouth. Raph, I'm so sorry. You did me a favor and _this _is how you get treated."

"He kept talking and talking! I had to shut him up, Aunt April!"

"_GRMPH!_" Raph grunted his anger at the girl freeing him.

"Sorry if this hurts, Raph," April said, leaning forward to get a hold of the tape on his mouth and ripping it away.

"You're niece…" Raph began, choosing his words carefully. "...is… _crazy_, Ape."

"Am not!" Paige shouted. "And you're supposed to be my friend! Friend's don't call each other crazy!"

"Enough, Paige!" April scolded the teenager.

"She got jumped by a couple of thugs outside before," Raph explained. "I stopped 'em from doing any damage, but the girl needs help or somethin', April. She's going to get herself or someone around her seriously hurt."

"You got _jumped_!?" April shouted.

"Yeah, only 'cuz turtle-toes made me go running outside after him. If he just stayed put like a good little pet turtle-"

"Pet turtle!?" April echoed incredulously. "Paige, you can't actually think of Raphael as someone who could be your _pet_… do you?"

"Everyone keeps saying that…" Paige answered quietly. "I don't see what the big deal is. I just want a friend. One that can't leave me."

"You have Chloe and Stacy, don't you?"

"I want _Raphie_!" She shouted, standing up and sidling around the chair Raph sat in. Raph tested his ropes and found, if anything, they were tighter. "And no one is going to stop me, Aunt April!"

"Paige, don't be ridiculous," April began, "You know you-"

Her niece suddenly shoved her. April's sock-covered feet slipped a bit on the tiled floor beneath them.

"Paige!" April shouted. "What the heck are you doing!"

"Just get in the closet, Aunt April," Paige demanded, shoving at her aunt again. "I'm taking Raphie home and that's that."

Raphael began writhing in his ropes. "April! Watch out! I told you the kid was off her rocker! Don't let her get you in that closet!"

"Paige, stop shoving me right now!" April demanded.

"I just have to lock you in for a little bit," Paige explained, shoving April further and further back, inching her aunt towards the waiting closet. "I'll send Chloe or Stacy over later to let you out… once I have Raphie there in a nice, secure, location!"

"Knock it off you little punk!" Raph shouted at her, trying desperately to escape the chair and aid his friend from the psycho girl trying to lock her in a closet.

"You keep that big beak shut, turtle-toes!" Paige told him, continuing to push at April. "I'm going to tape you up so good again when I'm done with Aunt April…"

"Paige, stop it! I'm not going in that closet!" April shouted. She'd managed to get a hold on the edges of the hallway, and was planting herself firmly and defiantly before her niece, huffing and puffing to catch her breath.

"Fine! Then I'll just tape _you _up, too, Aunt April!" Paige yelled. The teenage girl spun back, snatched the roll of duct tape from the counter, and faced her aunt with it stretched menacingly out before her. "You just hold still, Aunt April. You tried keeping me from my Raphie. I can't let you do that."

"_Paige_!" April growled, but by then, her niece had pounced.

When it was all said and done, Raph unable to do anything but watch on from the kitchen helplessly, April had her hands and feet duct taped together and Paige had even managed to wrap up her torso a few times, pinning her arms down at her sides. Her twisted niece hopped her over to a chair next to Raphael and guided her down beside him before finishing up by wrapping her to the chair's back.

The two of them sat, side-by-side, holding each other's eyes with the same mixture of apprehension and disbelief.

Paige stood before them, hands on her hips, grin on her face. "I really _am _a ninja, aren't I!" She leaped into the air. "COWABUNGA!"


	8. Chapter 8

"It's not _my _fault, Raph!" April shouted.

"It is too your fault, Ape!" Raph retorted.

The two of them were tied up in April's kitchen chairs, courtesy of April's insane niece, facing one another. Paige had tied April up the same as Raph, her torso and ankles wrapped to the chair's back and legs, so that the two could only face each other, fuming and glowering at one another as they argued, helpless to budge an inch from their positions.

Paige strolled past them, seemingly oblivious to their anger, whistling a cheerful tune as she rolled the carpet away in the hall and began running a measuring stick around various angles of the apartment. What she was doing, Raph had no clue.

"How did you let her tie you up in the first place!?" April asked.

"She… she _tricked _me, April!" Raphael defended. "She made it seem like she was some innocent little girl, when really? She's a-"

Paige looked his way, her brow furrowed above her dark eyes, and Raph cut his sentence short.

"I can't _believe _this," April whined, writhing in her ropes. "You let a teenage girl get the drop on you."

"So did you!"

"Yeah, but I'm a _news _reporter, Raph. You're a ninja turtle. You're not supposed to get captured by people still in _high_ _school_!" April raised a brow and craned her neck back to Paige. "You _are _still going to high school… right Paige?"

"Yeah, kinda, I guess," her niece said, tossing aside the measuring stick. "I mean, I was there last week… once or twice."

"That's just great," April said, shaking her head. "Paige, untie me now, alright?"

"Aunt April, you know what I said about asking about being untied."

"Oh, come _on _Paige! I'll… I'll give you twenty dollars to untie me!"

"Who needs twenty dollars when you got your own walking, talking ninja turtle-man as your pet? I'm going to make a fortune just selling tickets to _see_ Raphie there! Oooo I'm going to buy a car! No - a truck! A hot pink pick-up truck so that I can take you all over the city with me in the back, Raphie! So much FUN!"

Raph widened his eyes on April and whispered, "We have to get out of here - _now_!" He wiggled against his binds.

"_How_!?" April whispered back.

"_Let me think of something."_

_"Oh, great, Raph. You've done a _wonderful _job so far 'thinking of things'!"_

Raph frowned, but ignored her insult. "_Let's see… how about… no. Maybe-_"

"Whisper, whisper, whisper," Paige said, sauntering into the kitchen with her hands on her hips. She looked between the two of them tied to their chairs and tucked a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. "I like to whisper too. Let's whisper together. Go on. You first, Raphie. Continue with what you were _saying_."

Raph stared at her, wary of some trick.

"Oh, nothing to say now?" Paige asked.

_Just ignore her and she'll go back to whatever crazy thing she was doing, _Raph thought, trying his best to look defeated.

"Huh. Well," Paige said, grabbing the roll of duct tape from the kitchen table. "If you don't have anything to say to _me_, I guess you don't have anything to say at all."

"Wait, Paige! You don't have to-" Raph shouted, but before he could manage another word, his beak was buried in a layer of duct tape. Raph could only watch as April's psychotic niece's smile widened and she patted it down over his lips. When she'd finished, his mouth securely sealed, she tore the roll loose, tossed it aside, and threw her head back in a fit of maniacal laughter.

"No more whispering now, huh!?" Paige cheered. "Noisy little turtle."

"Paige!" April shouted.

"What? He's _my_ turtle and I like a _quiet _turtle. And when I get him home, he's only allowed to talk twice a day and it has to be about me and how cool I am or how pretty he thinks I look. Right, Raphie?"

Raph grumbled as he glowered up at his evil captor.

"What's that, Raphie?" Paige asked. "I can't understand you. If you don't _want _to be my little pet turtle, just say so."

"_MMM!_"

Paige shrugged. "Guess you don't mind." She pet his head. "Now, time to get you two ready for departure."

April's eyes found Raph's and widened. She turned back to Paige. "_Departure_?"

"Yep." Paige retrieved the carpet she'd removed from the hall and laid it out on the kitchen floor. "I'm pretty sure you two will fit down the hall all wrapped up in there."

"You're turtlenapping, er, kidnapping _me _too!?" April snapped.

"Well, not really. I'm just taking you with us till we get home. Then I guess I have to let you go, but you better not tell anyone on me, Aunt April! I don't want anyone coming to take my Raphie from me! And if anyone _does_?" She raised a hand, her fingers hooked in a pinching gesture. "You get a pinching."

"Don't you _dare_ pinch me, Paige!"

A mischievous grin rose on the teenager's face. She bit her lip, lurched forward, and pinched her Aunt's arm.

"_Ow_!" April whined. "That sort of stings, Paige!"

"And there's _plenty _more where that came from, too! So you keep quiet about my Raphie and me, Aunt April!"

April opened her mouth to protest, but Paige lifted her hand menacingly forward again, and April was quick to button up.

"Better. Now, I'm going to wait for Stacy and Chloe downstairs. They're coming back to help get you guys home. You two behave up here or its pinches for you, Aunt April, and _tickles _for you, Raphie!" She laughed and shoved her wiggling fingers into Raph's side, sending him jerking against his ropes and laughing uncontrollably into the tape on his mouth. Paige squealed in delight. "So much _FUUUN_!"

She clapped, pet him again, turned, and skipped off down the hall. The apartment door slammed shut a moment later.

Raph looked at April.

April looked at Raph.

At the same time, they launched into a desperate attempt to free themselves, wiggling and jerking and writhing and tugging every which way they could at Paige's ropework, but after five, exhausting, minutes, neither of them had made an inch of progress; if anything, Raph thought his binds felt _tighter_.

"Geeze," April muttered. Her face had gone red and she was panting to catch her breath. "That niece of mine sure ties a good knot, huh?"

Raph pulled once more at his ropes. When they didn't budge, he groaned and slumped back into the chair in defeat.

April sighed. "This is _so _your fault, Raphael."

Raphael frowned and shook his head.

"All you had to do was _not _let her tie you up. That's it. So simple. Now we're going to get hauled off into the New York city streets wrapped up in a _carpet! _Oh, God… we're going to _die_! Raph! Get us free - right _now_!"

Raph rolled his eyes and couldn't help but protest. "_Mmm mmph hm grm mmmmph mf grm_."

April raised an eyebrow. "Huh? You know I can't understand whatever you're mumbling on about under that gag of yours, Raph."

Raph grunted, nodding towards April, trying to let her know it was _her _fault, not his, for this whole mess, and there was no 'magic ninja trick' he could pull to get them free.

"I'm going to assume you're trying to say 'Sorry, April. You're right. I'm my fault'. Well, apology accepted."

Raph's eyes widened as he shook his head furiously.

"Would you just focus on getting us out of this mess, Raph? This is insane! And I'm tired of it, and- and, you know what!? I want _out _of this already!" April shouted, hopping in frustration in her chair.

When the wooden legs came back down to the tiled floor beneath them, a _crack _filled the kitchen, and the chair April was seated in burst apart underneath her. She tumbled to the floor, her eyes widened in shock, and she yelped upon landing on her butt. She lifted her arms and held them out before her in awe: she was free.

A surge of excitement coursed through every inch of Raphael. He smiled beneath the duct tape and nodded his head, wiggling eagerly side to side and beckoning April, whose stunned look had been replaced by one of joy, over to him. April clambered to her feet and stretched her arms over her head, her eyes rolling back pleasurably as she did. She cracked her neck and hurried over to him. "God, that feels good." She reached for the duct tape keeping him quiet and ripped it away.

"_Ow! _Geeze, April, why don't you just rip my _lips _off while you're at it!" Raph complained. "Now get me out of this stupid chair already, will ya!? And what I was _trying _to say before was that none of this crap is _my _fault! It was _your _stupid niece who did this to us, and it was _your _stupid call for me to come babysit that I'm here at all! I never asked for this crap! I never wanted to be _turtlenapped! Oh_, and of course let's not forget to mention the fact that it was _you _who-" April shoved the tape back down firmly over his mouth, shutting him up. "_MMMMPH!?_"

"I'll get that last, okay?" She smiled, tapped his re-taped beak, and moved around to the back of the chair. "Alright, I'm going to get you untied, Raph. Just hold on."

Raph rolled his eyes and grumbled his dissatisfaction. April and Paige were certainly related, that much was clear.

"Okay, let's see," April muttered from behind the chair. "If I just pull here and twist here… no, no that didn't work. Maybe… maybe yank _this _and loosen _that_?"

Raphael groaned and writhed impatiently against his ropes.

"You know, that's not really helping, Raph. Geeze… she's got you tied up really tight, doesn't she? Where are your sais, anyway?"

_Sais_, he thought. He hadn't seen them since April's demonic niece hid them away on him, but… "_MMPH!_" He grunted nodding his head towards the kitchen, where a nice, sharp, pair of scissors were lying in wait on the countertop.

"Huh?" April poked her head over his shoulder, and followed the line of his gesturing nods to the kitchen. "Oh! Genius, Raph!"

Raph nodded enthusiastically.

April hurried into the kitchen, moved her hands towards the scissors, and-

-moved _right past _them and to the counter's drawer.

Raph shook his head. "_Mm-mm!_"

April yanked a small, electronic, device from within and held it up victoriously between them. "The turtle-communicator! I'll get Leo and the guys to come help me get Paige under control!"

Raph rolled his eyes.

April, oblivious to his displeasure, flipped the device open, punched in a quick series of numbers, and held it to her ear as she walked back towards Raphael. A moment later, his brother Leonardo's voice came crackling over the speaker: "_Hey, April. What's up?_"

"Leo, I need your help," April said at once. "It's Paige. She's… well, she's acting _crazy, _Leonardo! Can you get the guys together and come over as soon as you can?"

"_Oh, sure, April. No problem. We'll be there soon, though I don't know where Raph is at the moment. He never came back after-"_

"Oh, don't worry. I'm with Raphael. He's right here next to me."

Raph craned his neck back to her and frowned. "_Mmf! Mmm! Mmmmph!_"

"Yeah, that's him. He's got a gag on. Paige has been keeping him all tied up in my kitchen chair. Poor Raph. She had _me_ tied up, too, but… I guess I was just too _smart _to let myself get captured for good," she said, eyeing Raph at the word '_smart_' and winking. He rolled his eyes and immediately starting mumbling again and wiggling his lips around. "I think Raph's trying to say something. You want to speak to him, Leo? Hold on, I'll-"

"_Nah, I'm good, April. We've all heard enough of Raph's big mouth to last a lifetime. Just tell my hot-headed brother: shame on him. Master Splinter would be very disappointed. We'll see you soon._"

Raphael plotted out a dozen way he was going to hurt his brother when he got his hands on him.

"Okay. Thanks, Leo," April said, snapped the communicator shut, and tucked it into her nightgown. She breathed relief and ran her hands through the tangles of her messy hair before laying them on Raphael's shoulders and smiling. "Okay, we're going to be alright, Raph. As long as Paige doesn't come back right at this moment and-"

"_Aunt April!?"_

The teenager's shrill voice cut into Raph's ears so sharply he winced.

April spun to the hallway in terror.

Paige, Chloe, and Stacy were huddled together, hands on their hips, matching expressions of shock on their little, demonic, faces. It was Paige, of course, who spoke first. "What are you doing out of your ropes, Aunt April!? How did you get untied!?"

"Paige, just calm down," April began, moving cautiously towards her deranged niece with her hands raised placatingly. "Now, listen-"

Paige shook her head. "Chloe. Stacy. Stuff my Aunt in the closet and lock her up in there."

"_Paige!_" April shouted.

Neither Chloe nor Stacy looked thrilled at the prospect. "Uh… really, Paige? April's an _adult_." Stacy said.

Paige whipped around, darted her hand for her friend's exposed arm, and pinched, prompting a loud yelp from Stacy as the blond girl stumbled backwards rubbing at the wound. "Any _more _questions? How about you Chloe?"

Chloe rapidly shook her head, fear widening her eyes.

"Good, now grab my Aunt and lock her up," Paige narrowed her eyes on April. "She's been a _bad _Aunt. Looks like I won't be bringing her along after all."

"Paige…" April groaned, but by then, the teenager's friends were at her sides, taking hold of her arms.

"Sorry about this, April," Stacy whined.

"Yeah, sorry, April," Chloe added, but neither of them hesitated in pulling April towards the hallway closet.

April struggled only weakly against them, her eyes filled with disappointment when they landed upon her niece, and she was led quickly inside the closet as the door was slammed shut and locked behind her.

"And as for _you, _Raphie!" Paige shouted, turning her fury on Raph now that her Aunt had been dealt with. She stomped up to his chair, ignoring his muffled protests, and stuck her index finger to the tip of his beak. "You better behave from now on or you'll be sorry. Chloe, Stacy, let's go. Help me get him out of this chair."

Raph was helpless but to watch as the trio of teenaged demons removed the binds strapping him to the chair, but left the ones locking his wrists up together behind his shell. They pulled him to a stand, and Raph considered simply barreling over them and making a run for it. Before he had the chance, however, Paige reached for his bandanna and tugged it sideways around his head. The result was that his own bandanna had become a makeshift blindfold. He couldn't see a thing. He began angrily grunting and groaning, but the girls simply shoved him forward till he walked, stumbling blindly into April's apartment with no clue where he was going.

After a few, wobbly, steps, little hands took hold of his shell and shoved. He shouted into the duct tape as he sailed forward, unable to stop himself from falling, and crashed to the floor. Before he knew what hit him, the world started spinning.

"_MMMMPH!_" Raph protested as he spun and spun, and the realization hit him: the world wasn't spinning, he was being wrapped up in the carpet! The soft, warm, fabric hugged at his arms and legs and torso tighter and tighter until he couldn't so much as _consider _budging an inch.

When it was done, he felt like a turtle cocoon, all wrapped up tight from his ankles to his shoulders. Immobilized, Paige must've figured the threat of him escaping was over. The girl fixed his bandanna so he could see again. With his vision returned, he glared furiously into the smug, smirking, face of April's niece hovering above him before craning his neck to glimpse his carpet-wrapped body. He frowned and wiggled, but he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

"Turtle-wrap!" Paige cheered, clapping her hands.

Chloe and Stacy shared a nervous look over her shoulder, but when April's niece spun to face them, they both quickly replaced the expression with one of mock excitement and clapped along.

"We got him now, huh?"

"Heh, yep. Sure do, Paige," Chloe said.

"Oh, uh, yeah, he's wrapped up nice and good," Stacy added.

"_Paige! Let me out of here!_" April's voice came muffled from behind the closet door and she banged against it five times in quick succession.

"Put a sock in it, Aunt April!" Paige shouted. Her eyes floated back to Raph's and the little punk's smirk rose higher. "Speaking of putting a sock in it, let's see what Raphie here has to say about being all wrapped up like a little Hot Pocket Turtle Treat!"

She ripped the duct tape from his mouth, and Raph was so angry, for a second, all he could do was glare up at his captor. "Paige," he began when his rage came a bit more under his control, "I've given up trying to bargain with you. Congratulations. You've got me. You beat me. I'm your prisoner and there's nothing I can do abut it… for now. But eventually? Maybe not within the next ten minutes or the next ten hours, or even the next ten _day_, but _eventually? _I _am _going to get loose. You better start running when I do you little punk."

Paige, miraculously, actually _laughed _then. "What are _you _going to do to me, Raphie? I've got you all tied up nice and tight and wrapped in a carpet, and guess what? I ain't letting you loose anytime soon, turtle-toes, so zip your lip!"

"I'm just letting you know," Raph went on, forcing himself to remain calm. "I was nice to you last time you needed help. Next time? Mr. Nice-Turtle is no more. You're a little brat, that's all, Paige. Nothing but a little, punk, _brat_."

Paige snickered. "Oooooo a 'brat'. How _mean _of you, my Raphie! L - O - L! I don't care if I'm a brat! That's kind of awesome, actually. I'm a super-punk rebel _brat_ and I LIKE it!" She lifted her index and pinky finger in a 'metal' sign and stuck her tongue out between them. "Yeah!"

"_Paige! Get me out of this closet right now!_"

Paige rolled her eyes. "Quiet in there, Aunt April," then to her friends, "We have to get my Raphie out of here. My Aunt is being a total buzzkill." Her eyes moved to Raph's and she smiled sinisterly. "Are you weady to be taken home and made my widdle pet turtle, Raphie?"

"_Argh_!" Raph growled his frustration. He was quickly losing the fight with his anger and the fact that wiggling around in the carpet was doing him absolutely no good wasn't helping. "You can't do this, Paige! I'm a ninja turtle! You can't just _kidnap _me!"

"_Turtle_nap you. I'm _turtle_napping you, Raphie."

"No, Paige, you _aren't_!" Raph snapped.

"Uh, yeah. I kinda am. And if you shout at me one more time, I'm going to be _forced _to unleash a 'turtle tickle attack' on you. Is that what you want?"

Voices came floating down the hall. Familiar voices. The voices of his brothers. Raph and Paige locked eyes, his widening in hope, her's widening in fear. "_LEO!_" He shouted. "_Hurry up and get in here! I'm all tied up!_"

"Batten the hatches!" Paige commanded her stunned friends.

"Huh?"

"Wha?"

Paige threw her arms up. "LOCK THE _DOORS_, YOU IDIOTS!"

Chloe and Stacy scrambled down the hall, slammed the apartment door shut, and locked, bolted, and chained it every way they could. Finished, they spun back and gave Paige a thumbs up.

Paige breathed relief. "Damn those pesky brothers of yours, Raphie!" She growled. "I'm going to turtlenap _all _of them one day!"

A pounding came at the front door. Leo's voice came, "_Hello? Paige, are you in there? We talked to April, Paige. It's over. Open up._"

"It's not over till me and my Raphie are riding off into the sunset, turtle-breath!" Paige shouted at the door. "He's _my _pet!" She stared down at him. "You're _MIIIIINE!_" She screamed, reached for her hair, and tore a little fistful out. She looked at it, shrugged, and tossed it aside. "Let's go, Raphie!"

"Paige," he began. "You're not taking me anywhere you little- _MMMMPH!"_

She'd ripped a fresh rectangle of duct tape from its roll and plastered his mouth over again. "That'll shut you up for a while. Now no more wasting time. Chloe! Stacy! Grab this rebellious little pet turtle of mine and get him up on his big ugly turtle-feet! We're taking him out the fire escape!"

"The f-f-fire escape!?" Stacy stammered.

"You heard me, Stace! Now _GET MY RAPHIE MOVING!_"

Chloe and Stacy nervously surrounded Raph as both Leo and April pounded on their respective doors. Paige led the charge and the three teenaged girls worked together to get Raphael up off the ground. When he was standing, they started shoving him over to the window, and Raph could do nothing but grunt and mumble and hop along in his stupid carpet-wrap.

At the window, Paige released him, hurried beside it, and pulled it open. Cool New York air flooded the apartment along a chorus of passing cars and other city sounds. Paige climbed through to the fire escape, spun back on them, a mad look in her eye, and commanded, "Stuff him out to me! I'll take the turtle-hand-off and make my escape! You two stall those big, mean, brothers of his!"

"_Mmm-mmmm_!" Raph pleaded, eyeing the steep fall from April's apartment a few stories off the ground level.

"You keep quiet now, Raphie! Come on! Hand over that little turtle of mine!"

"B-But what if you drop him!?" Chloe asked.

"_GIVE HIM HERE!_"

"Paige, this is crazy!" Stacy shouted.

"_GIMME THAT TURTLE RIGHT NOOOOOOW!_"

The girls shared a look. Together, they moved to the window and _slammed _it shut on Paige, quickly locking the top before the insane teenager on the other side could pry it back open. Paige's eyes widened with incredulous rage and she pounded her fists against the glass, shouting something that could not be heard within the apartment. She pulled a fistful of hair from her head again, kicked the window, and darted her eyes around the fire escape. She saw _something_, because the next second - she disappeared.

Raph sighed and felt a terrible weight lift from his shoulders. The nightmare… was over.

Stacy and Chloe hurried to open the doors letting April _out_, and Leo and his brothers _in_. The three groups converged in the kitchen.

"What happened!? Where's Paige!?" April asked.

"We locked her outside the window," Stacy explained.

"Yeah, she was gettin' REAL crazy there," Chloe added. "And we weren't about to let our BFF, Raphael, over there get hurt."

Leo crossed the room to Raph with his arms folded across his chest. He halted before him, shaking his head reproachfully as he looked Raph's carpet-wrapped body up and down. "Really, Raph? A _carpet_? This whole thing has to be the _worst_ display of ninja ability in history."

"_Mmm fmm mmph mmm!_" Raph mumbled.

"I say we leave him like this for awhile," Leo suggested. "Teach him a lesson."

"_MMMM!"_

"Yeah, the gag is definitely an improvement on Raph's big beak there," Leo added with a chuckle.

Raph was getting ready to headbutt his brother when the lights went out.

A blackness stole across every inch of April's apartment.

"Ow!" Someone shouted. "Who pinched me!"

"It wasn't me! OW! What the-!?"

"What was that?"

"Where!?"

"Hey- OW! I got pinched too!"

"Dudes, I do not like this! I hate pinching! I don't want to- OW!"

"It's my niece, guys! She cut the power! Where is everyone! OW!"

"OW OW OW! That totally stings!"

Hands wrapped Raphael's waist and pulled him through the darkness, Raph unable to do anything besides hop along and silently protest. In the dark, he heard Paige snicker, then they were gone.


End file.
